Milk Crown on Sonetchka
Rachie
Well, I only really laughed 'cause they were laughing at me
So then why is it they seem so angry?
Whenever how I want to be isn't like reality
Why do I always have to say: I'm sorry?
Don't really care about my hair but mom is angry at me
And I can only every say: Forgive me
You said that hurting other people ends up hurting you too
But now I'm thinking that you didn't mean that, did you?
No I can't do it, there's no way that
I could just do it, don't just say that
Sure I could do it, don't you get that?
I don't have the talent, I know that for a fact, hey
Whoever's up there, hey if you're listening
Surely you'd help this scum with one thing
Suddenly right there, just like a spell
A ceremony with a crown and a sceptre
If only I could go and replace her
Prim and proper? No, I can't be her
Can't you see that this tiny, tiny world is full of sins and lies?
Maybe you'll curse it, say you don't deserve this
But will it make thing all better, better?
And as for all of the textbooks claiming to show true love you sell
Just forget them and burn them
They're nothing but lies as well
Wait, just why are you so terrified whenever you speak?
You don't always have to say you're sorry
I couldn't formulate an answer, getting harder to breathe
I started crying 'cause it felt so silly
This egocentric thinking permeated every belief
To the point where it was blocking any Sun from reaching
Looking to the sky with a fake big sigh
But the crows overhead had something else in mind
Getting good at wasting time by lying down so often that I
Felt like I was fusing with the bed, dead, unbreathing
Even so I still prefer it better than the feeling of them
Point at me back, there's nothing worse than that
Maybe if you could spare some time
Could you teach me the proper way to smile?
Yet in the end I buried it away
This dirty little wish I had as I kept crying inside
What should I do with these emotions, sister
True and normal that I feel?
Should I discard them? Or throw 'em or guard them?
How do I tell if they're dirty, dirty?
Don't just give me a grossed out look
Hey, give me a real answer
Treat me just like an equal begging, a soft whisper
Left by herself, was a half-drawn sketch
Never painted in, with no love left
Though I begged and begged and begged
I was left to fend here for myself
It's too much, am I not enough?
Is it my fault? Am I just that hard to love?
Or is it just that no matter what anyone does it's never enough?
Can't you see that this tiny, tiny world is full of sins and lies?
Maybe you'll curse it, say you don't deserve this
But will it make thing all better, better?
And as for all of the textbooks
Claiming to show true love you always sell
They're overcomplicating things, it's easy so don't overthink
The flower blooms in brilliant shades of pink